The Final Curtain Call

Bells Are Ringing closed last weekend. But what a fun, unique, and beautiful experience to act with some of Utah's best talent :-)

nap time

You know that time of the day...when the exhaustion sets in...the summer heat is compressing in on you like the air before a storm...and the only thing that will salve the extreme weariness you feel is to nap? :-)

I have been thinking this is how life is. Sometimes...the pressure builds, the heat is on, and we keep going on like champs, but we still need to nap. And I don't mean literal sleep, (though I adore real naps one hundred and ten percent). I mean 'life' naps.

Because quite frankly, I get tired of putting on a happy, hopeful, nice face to all the guys I am NOT and never WILL be interested in that keep pursuing me, only to have the ones that DO pique my interest disappoint me on some bone-deep level. And I in no way mean this in an ungrateful or mean way to the guys that are hopeful would be's of mine...truly. Its just that I need a nap from the happy 'sure I'll go out with you...even if its just for charity' smile. And a nap from the guys I AM into who just don't step up...or let me down in some way. And the funny thing is, I think I am pretty hard to let down. Really...I am very easily made happy. Because I am a generally happy person, but it just seems more and more that I keep swimming, and instead of getting closer to shore, the tide is pulling me further away.

Nap time?
Yes please.

Love

The Queen of Almost Fairytales.

i feel like a pizza

Lately I have felt like a pizza. I am a whole entity made up of many ingredients. Which are mostly yummy. But like a pizza, I feel sliced in many directions. Being pulled in two or three directions is one thing...but try ten...or one hundred. Or one hundred and thirteen.
Cases in point:
The Play: I am currently in a play (Bells are Ringing) and it has been a wonderful experience. I haven't done theater properly in some time, and its been great to dress up all purty and get hot under the lights. There is a rare adrenaline in performing. And I like it. But I think I would like it more if it was my ABSOLUTE number one passion. At times it has felt as if I sacrifice so much (a best friends wedding, camping with the homies, dating time, etc) time to something that really is not my number one. Though I seem to have a draw to performing...so...meh.

Writing: Now this one comes close in the race for number one passion. I have been writing since I could pick up a pen. I am currently working on a YA piece of fiction. Working title? Ingenue. Yes, perhaps me being in a play serves more than one purpose. Research. This particular story has characters that are literally screaming inside my brain twenty four seven. I want MORE time then I ever have to write, and ironically, I have less.

Songwriting: NO. this is not the same as writing. Some pluses? I can sit at the piano, and if inspired, can crank one of these babies out in twenty minutes. Its like making instant brownies. Instant gratification. I LOVE writing songs. Love. Love. Love. Working on a demo this summer. Enough said.

LDSSA: Oh institute. How I love you. And how I love the leadership program there. I can't wait until my summer clears up more and I can be more than just a phantom name on the LDSSA list and an actual participating member. ha.

Dance: Still calls to me. I just have no time. Erg.

Fitness: I could literally spend five hours a day working out if I could fit it in. I love it. Why are there only twenty four hours in one day?

Princess Time: Doing princess parties is fun, rewarding, BLOODY hard work. But I love it.

Book Trailer Time: I am WAY too much of an entrepreneur. Princess party business, book trailer business, what else can I start...? not.

General Granola Time: I have a Native American side to me. I want to spend time outside in moccasins. So sue me.

And People Time: I need to spend time with my amazing family, friends, and...boys. Duh.

Lets not forget work.

And school (when its in session)

I am most definitely a pizza.